But...the pool will be so dirty!

"Oooh, look they're curtains. Or are they drapes? Hahaha I'm so punny"


"Hmm...your birthday...is it in Octoboer?" - "No, August" - "I knew it started with an 'A'..." - Flick (blonde).


"Wow...he really IS holding a coconut" - Chris on coconuts.

"So, If I gave you AID's..." - Dean on giving Dwyer AID's.


"You can hear God, you can see God *keeps droning on*" - "No...when you hear God you're schizophrenic." - Dwyer Vs Jenny on religion. (Stay tuned for when she tries to convince him to wank....)


"Your legs are like peanut butter, smooth and easy to spread." - "AND THEY'RE NUTTY!!" - Don't ask.


"My dog is a slut. She leaves a trail of smell everywhere." - Dwyer on religion.


"Was it Sarah or SEB?" - Chris on asking whether it was one person or the same person.

"You're NOT supposed to be having fun" - Substitute history teacher when everyone was laughing at Chris for not knowing one person from herself.


"The curtains are crooked. OR are the drapes wonky?" - Jenny talking to Sophie about...something.


My little monkey won KOFM's twist top trivia, CHRISSIE IS A CLEVER DICK!!!

"Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she was a pumpkin." - Dwyer on Romeo's suicide.


"Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread." - Dwyer on Juliet's suicide.


"What's the difference between a pile of bricks and a blonde? Bricks get laid." - Dwyer on religion.

"Five blondes and a brunette are hanging off a rope over crocodile infested waters, the brunette says 'I HAVE AN IDEA!!' the blondes clap..." - Dwyer on Mooy (no, seriously, he was on Mooy at the time)


"I know a blonde joke" - "FLICK!!" - Dean's blonde joke being told by Jenny.


NESS QUOTES
"So to me you're you, but to you you're me? Haha you're a ewe. So you're a sheep eating a kiwifruit...ahahah kiwi sheep! ... You have very grim prospects..."

Mindfuck

Jenny: Sex perfumes.
Chris: What?!
Jenny: Sex perfumes.

Chris: ... what about them?

Jenny: Its a pesticide apparently. I think it must kill from exhaustion. *Starts singing a song about sex perfumes* Sorry. It's catchy.
Chris: I imagine it would be.



Jenny: Mum said I might be getting foxtel for my birthday.
Chris: Ha, ha...You'd have to call yourself stupid then.
Jenny. You're just lovely, arent you?
Chris: Well, you're not exactly nice to me.
Jenny: I think you misunderstand the meaning of lovely.
Chris:You meant it sarcastically didn't you?
Jenny: Or DID I?
Chris: Or AM it? ... well that was weird.

Chris: ... It's not the penis they cut off you know.
Jenny: Meh, balls whatever.
Chris: You take a very lax attitude to this.

Twinkle Twinkle Little Bat, how I wonder why you're fat
Eating all that purple cheese, eating cats I don't like fleas
Twinkle Twinkle Little Bat, how I wonder why you're fat.


"The ocean east of Sydney? There's nothing east of Sydney!!"


"I am NOT Vanessa!! Don't try and make me be who I'm not" - Chrissie on some sort of hallucinogen.

"What have you got against a cross dresser thinking you're hot?"

A cheerleader with anger management issues. (Not Chris)

NESS QUOTES!!

"I don't think people with the same colour skin as hair are hot"

AND A BONUS NESS QUOTE!!

"Shitta sat on Afrika"

I have a red pen.

This blog is dedicated fully to CHRIS(sie) QUOTES!!


"You would not believe how much like a chicken you sound." (Guess who he was talking about...)


"My kindergarten teacher called me 'Professor Absent-Minded' because I was always contemplating my navel." (Chrissie has an inny belly button, so does Saxon, Mooy and Dean's belly button is just weird.)


"I JUST HAD AN EPIPHANY!! BANANAS ARE AN EXCELLENT SOURCE OF POTASSIUM!!" (I'll take his word for it, a MONKEY should know.)


"WOW!! OUR ENGLISH/DRAMA TEACHER USES TROLL MAGIC!!" (It's true, he does. I've been saying it for months. No one ever listens to me...As soon as CHRIS starts saying it though...)

"I JUST HAD ANOTHER EPIPHANY!! I am incredibly good looking" - "Stick to bananas, Chrissie."


"Yes, I intended to get that quoted." (He's so up himself)

"Blah blah blah...chicks." - "Chicks? Chick magnet? Oh wait...that's me!!" (See above bracket)

Purple Wall

Chrissie added a new thing to his Drama act today, I vote it the most awesome thing that we will see at the Comedy Festival. Not on ly does he do the MAGIC POTATO DANCE but now he has added a CHEERLEADER. Until you have seen Chris in a blonde wig with two pom-poms singing in a horrible screachy voice...you have not lived.


Me: Mr Grogan, will you PLEASE tell Flick off and call her dee-speak-able. Mr Grogan: I can't do that. It'll scar her for life. Amy: In year 7 Mr Sajko called me a 'brazen hussey' Mr Grogan: And see how she turned out.

Jenny: Gosh. Do you know how rude it is to bleed on people?
Chris: He's dead. I don't think he cares. He's not going to tell her off for it in the afterlife. Jenny:I can picture his ghost yelling at her, "YOU BITCH!! YOU'RE BLEEDING ON ME!! I WANT A DIVORCE!!"


"YOU'RE ALL SMOKING BARBIES!!!" - Jenny on...god knows what.


"Yes. That's right. You wouldn't expect something so high to come out of something so wide, would you?" - I don't remember where/when/who I said that (to).

"If I threw you at James...would you inflict a lot of pain?" - Jenny to a rat-like person.


"She's cool if you're a comic book." - The Other Jenny on Laura.

"Grrr...GROW A PENIS!!" - Jenny, talking to the rat-like person again.

And now for...

THE NESS QUOTE OF THE DAY

"I didn't know my foot was in the door until after I slammed the door."


And an all new attraction to this blog thingy thing...

GUESS WHO MADE THE QUOTE

"So you're using synonyms for 'short' now?"

Moon Rooster

There has got to be something wrong with our education system when in Science we watch a video involving a little old lady giving a frozen chicken CPR and a scary old (bearded, yucky) man impersonating a rooster.

Cock-a-doodle-doo never used to be as funny. It used to be a serious sound that a chooken would make.

The facejump is awesome.

Have you ever witnessed Chris stroke The Fuzz and say reassuringly "Don't listen to her, I'll keep you safe" ? It's ironic because he's going to shave it off at some point this year :'(

I was just pointing out that with The Fuzz, I could take over the world. Chrissie said no...stupid short child.


I was told to stop making innuendo's at one point. I would have too seeing as Chrissie demanded so nicely...but I'm still unsure about the meaning so I just sang "Don't take offence to my...inneundo".


I made up a JENNY THEME SONG to the tune of Skip to the Lou. It's awesomness extreme...


Apparently the girl I adopted as my sister yesterday has a boyfriend. As her (adopted) older sister I demanded to meet this boy. She said she would introduce her favourite (adopted) older sister as soon as she'd finished tapping the water tank outside L block...She's so weird. I'M SO PROUD!! Unfortunately, I also found out she lives in Toronto (not in Canada)...*sigh* I might as well disown her if I can't get to her foxtel and swimming pool... :(


William Brown kissed Josie (on the cheek). She just sat there paralyzed until I took action and grabbed her arm and ran her to the toilets to wash the poison off before it sank into the skin and killed her. I totally saved her life :D

I DEMAND to see Trent's arms. We've been at this school for 2 and a bit years AND I HAVE NEVER SEEN HIS GODDAMN ARMS!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT KID?!?!

So, I asked dear Mooy to help me. Ya gotta love Mooy. He may be short but he's so sweet with it. He promised to help me pull Trent's jacket off when he doesn't expect it so I might see his arms.

Apparently when I yell the brown part of my eyes gets bigger...
Why Mat (year 8) was looking at my eyes when I yelled I have no idea. Why I was yelling...I can't remember. Everyone else was so I joined in too...I think.

THE NESS QUOTE OF THE DAY:

"I see, hear and smell imaginal creatures."

Never Squeeze Toads

Some people found ANOTHER use for the poison. CANE TOAD DRUG ABUSERS!!

Let's all go inhale Cane Toads.

An unusual act of Amplexus in Bufo Marinas.

EDGAR!! squeezed a toad and probably died.

I met my adopted sister again today. I adopted her even more when I found out she had FOXTEL!! and a SWIMMING POOL!! Now I just need to find out where she lives...(and her name)

I can fly. I proved it. Ness wants Chris and I to have a flying competition. I don't see why I should do that though. I'll win...........................................................................................or else.

Hackilackee KRIMEEEEEE! and a Nerri EW Ear.

Some smart cookie told Ness what cock meant. She spent the day saying things like "I was born in the year of the cock." and "We had cock for dinner last night." no one explained the OTHER meaning and hopefully no one will...I LOVE IT!!

Erin dropped by our Drama class today. Millie and I were playing a game of chess with one piece. I knocked Millie's piece over with a pool cue and an argument ensued.

Erin kept interrupting. When we told her to shut up because we were doing a performance she stated "OOOOOOOH, THAT WAS A DRAMA PERFORMANCE?! That sounds exactly like the kind of argument Jenny would have...I couldn't tell."

I still can't tell whether that's an insult to my sense or a compliment to my acting skills...

I mean, everyone knows you use a tennis racquet in chess. Speaking of pool cues...anyone gotta spare one they can lend Millie and I for the thingy? =D (a feather duster would also be GREATLY appreciated...)

"Cane Toads...erm...give me lots of...ah...enjoyment." - The guy from the video who resembled Mr Patrick far too well.

I got whacked over the head twice today. Once when I was trying to get Rhiannon to say ITS THE END right. She would only say its the end...which is wrong. She hit me over the head (quite hard). And Baidy hit me on the head with a corner of an Atlas.

Ness spent recess singing "In the Ning Nang Nong all the cows go BONG and the monkeys all say BOO! ... etc" I always thought of Chris going BOO!

She sang the chorus wrongly and wouldn't listen to reason...

Ow.

The giant pink sea snail has a cold.

I CAN draw sheep. I just don't want to.

Steeeeeeve...IRWIN'S FOUNDATION FOR THE CHILDREN OF WAR LIKE ANNIE!

Unsheath my long sword, Ho! (It's funny because he DID get stabbed with it)

I managed to convince a girl I'd never met before today that I was her long lost sister. Why would I do such a thing? Because she has a pool and foxtel and lives nearish. I can't remember her name...

I called someone deluded. Ness then asked me why I would call her "diluted". It made me laugh because I pictured the deluded person in question as a puddle and the look really suited her.

Have you ever considered finding a man named Harold and painting his toe nails blue? I know I have.

If there are any men named Harold reading this...can I paint your toe nails blue?