Facebook is stealing most of my material!

I apologise. This is the first time in over 18 months that I have not made a post in over a month. I feel rather awful because...well...this isn't going to be a very long post as it is. It's not my fault though! It's FACEBOOK'S! Everytime something funny happens, or if I mention something funny... my father puts it on Facebook. So I apologise that this... small blog writer is having difficulty competing with a much bigger social networking site. I WILL STRIVE TO DEFEAT THIS!

Millie: "Look at Geordie!"
Jenny: "Is he asleep?"
Millie: "Yeah, I think he is."
Jenny: "Let's throw something at him!"
*Mrs Raby notices*
Mrs Raby: "IS GEORDIE ASLEEP?!?"
*Geordie wakes suddenly*
Mrs Raby: "That is the first time anyone's ever fallen asleep in MY class."

Jenny: "Mum! I have a freckly on my eyelid!"
Mum: "How do you know?"
Jenny: "I was looking in the mirror!"
Mum: "...You need your eyes closed to see your eyelid."

*The most unusual way a lesson has ever been started in my 11 years of school.*
Mrs Raby: "That runner is a haemaphrodite!"
*While Mrs Raby discussed this with Sam, other people in the class formed little chats of their own...*
Tory: "How do people get both parts?"
Jenny: "Everyone starts off as girls"
Tory: "Does that mean I might be a haemophrodite?"
Jenny: "No...I assume you would have a fully formed penis. A haemophrodite is someone who started to become a male but the testes didn't come through the vagina."
Tory: "But I don't have a vagina!"
Jenny: "THAT'S WHY YOU'RE NOT A HAEMAPHRODITE!"
*Class looks at Jenny...of course.*

Fletcher *looking out the door*: "Is that Lydia?"
Mrs Walker *waddles quickly out of the door, the class hears from the corridor*: "Lydia! Why aren't you in class?! Oh. It's not Lydia..."

Mrs Raby: "Jenny, are you doing German next year?"
Jenny: "Yes. I'm too scared of you not to."

To celebrate Toilet Guy's last day...nay...last ten-20 minutes in attendance at our school, Jenny approached him and said the following:

"Can I hug you? I love you. I really do. You don't know me, but I watch you."

(I just wanted his last day to be memorable. Personally, I'll never forget it. I tried doing the same to dear Nose Guy but he'd already gone...)

NESS QUOTE!

Jenny: "Did you know all the actors in Bewitched died of cancer?"
Ness: "What's Bewitched?"
Jenny: "A tv show."
Ness: "Is it a cartoon about ghosts?"
Jenny: "...No. Why?"
Ness: "You said the actors were dead. Is it about zombies?"
Jenny: "...It's from the 60s."
Ness: "Ooooooh!"